Sum of Everything

Yesterday was the ARMY pre-sale for some of the South East Asian countries for the BTS Arirang World Tour. Unable to sleep properly, I woke up before my 6 am alarm with palpable excitement and nervousness... only to get no tickets at all... I didn't get tickets at all. Nothing. Not a single one for the 5 shows in two different countries I was trying for. I can barely contain my disappointment enough to write this; considering that I spent the better part of 6 hours crying off and on. Nevertheless I tried again during the Live Nation pre-sale today, and got in the never-ending queue of that blue man walking on what is clearly a treadmill because he didn't move for HOURS - only for me to be kicked out at the absolute last second, because their servers couldn't handle the sheer volume of users trying to secure tickets. When I eventually did get to the purchasing page, even though there seemed to be seats remaining, it didn't allow me to book them saying that seat had been ...

I don't know what to talk about just yet, so I am just going to start writing. It has been an age since I actually sat down to write and put my words down on (digital) paper. I have been trying to journal (on physical paper) regularly, rather unsuccessfully, and most times the culprit is my lack of impulse control when it comes to doom scrolling. I swear I have been trying (not my best, admittedly) to try and not look at my phone first thing in the morning, but the temptation is overwhelming. I know all the cons of looking at the phone as the first thing in the morning. I give myself that lecture everyday, and its usually in my mother's voice. But adult free-will is a very dangerous thing. On the rare occasion that I do end up picking up my journal to do my morning pages, I am often distracted by trains of thoughts that ideally should have made it to the word vomit that the pages are supposed to be dedicated to, but end up simply disappearing into the ether, because my mind wor...

Your favourite artist may be on their way to take down their music from Spotify. If you suddenly can’t seem to find the song you were listening to on Spotify, you may be interested to know that several musicians are in the process of taking down their music from being available on the streaming platform, if they haven't already. Here's Why - 1.       Lowest royalty payout rates for artists – Spotify is infamous in the music industry for being the platform with some of the lowest royalty payout rates for artists. This is particularly important since the payment structure is not a per play per day basis, but on a slice-of-pie basis. Basically, Spotify keeps a percentage of the total revenue it receives and distributes the rest based on the streams generated by the artist on a pro-rated basis. While this appears fair, however, the existence of bot streams (which are ridiculously easy to buy) complicates the matter since bot streams significantly reduce the section of t...

It seems oddly serendipitous to begin the new year with a post titled "Beginnings", although this one has been in my drafts for an embarrassingly long time now. Much like most other posts, this post would also have looked very different had I written what I originally had in mind. However in the several intervening months between my last post and this one, life changing things have happened, the most significant one being that my sister officially moved to Korea to start her journey as an MBA student (and by the time this is posted, she has even completed a semester; so much for being regular with these posts). To say that my sister and I are close would be quite the understatement. Saying “ joined at the hip, reading each other's thoughts, and telepathically communicating even when not in each other's line of sight ” would be a more accurate description. So having her go from living 3 steps away across the dining room to 5,583 km spanning 7 time zones away is not ...

The title of this post is a trigger warning in itself, but just to be sure, there are going to be some heavy topics discussed in this one so if you are not ready to read something like this or are not in a space to tackle issues of love and loss, I would suggest revisiting this post another time. I doubt there is a single person on this planet who has not experienced loss - be it that of a loved one (human or fur baby), a favourite object, or relationships. We have all been at the receiving end of that merciless blow that life deals - sometimes, it isn’t as painful, we just stand up, brush the dust off our shoulders and move on. Sometimes though, the blow can be life altering. Loss is a feeling I am reasonably familiar with. Not only have I lost numerous possessions to the void of clumsy forgetfulness (I am convinced there is a galactic lost and found box that holds all the hair clips and rubber bands l have misplaced over the years with the only explanation for their random disapp...

Sometimes, the most insignificant of things can serve as a reminder of just how a random event led directly to the life you currently lead. One such seemingly insignificant thing happened last weekend, when I met my friend S after years. She was in town and we grabbed the chance to see each other in person after what seemed like eons. I was also finally introduced to her fiancé, who just happens to be a low key celebrity, just like S herself. While we were catching up, she told me her grandfather had asked after me and that set off a chain of thought… S and I have known each other since we were about 7 years old. She joined the school I was in and as both Tam-Brahms and late entrants into the same class, we developed a natural friendship. We lived in the same apartment complex, and soon her family shifted from Building B to Building A, right above the apartment our family lived in. Our families became close and we remained in touch even after they moved back to Chennai. About a year or...